Episode 18: "ALL CRUST NO PUNK" feat. Blaketheman1000 *FULL EPISODE ON PATREON*

Do we... Have we got... Have we got... Have we got a cold open? Uh... No. Flake? Flake... Flake the man... Two thousand. Flake the man bum thousand. Flake the girl. Flake the girl. Flake the... Oh, shit. Yeah. Drake the goat. No, no, no, no. I like... I like the girl. Uh-huh. So we just workshop it in real time? Okay. All right, all right, all right, all right. Well, we're recording now, so it's all on. Oh, we are? Oh, nice. You're going to get flake the girl 2K shitting and flushing. Nice. That'll be the cold open. Yeah, we'll just be the flush. Yeah. Wow. Really not beating the poo allegations. I have no interest in beating them anymore. If anything, I want to... I'm doubling... You want to double down on... I'm doubling down on mud pies, yeah. Don't say mud pies. Pardon? Don't say mud pies. That's fucking, it's vile. It's vile? Yeah. I feel like you're just not a Tim Robinson fan. I actually do think he's a little bit overrated. I have to go. Yeah. Who's Tim Robinson? They're like, they're like. I think you should leave, guy? He's good, man. Silly guy, silly comedy guy. Oh, okay. He has some like fantastic bits, but it's a little bit too shouty for me. I do appreciate his use of mud pie. Now I know what you're referencing. What is it? He just uses mud pie instead of to take a shit. Right, okay, yeah. And then there's like a specific, there's like a specific sketch where it's about like someone shitting in someone's house and like not owning up to it. And he's just like screaming like, you left a mud pie in my toilet. It's really, it's good. It's good. Wait, have you heard about Rob's 5am like diarrhea sink incident? Oh my God. I mean, do tell.

Sorry, we got an email from Mike. Okay, cool. He's going to come here. Okay, nice. Which is good. Alright. Do you guys want to get some lunch after this? Yeah. Fucking hit a big lunch. I want to walk somewhere visually appealing. I need to go to the lingerie as well. Okay. But I can do that later. I spent a stupid amount on pizza yesterday that like... was good but not how much it costed for every glasses yeah yeah yeah because i when i was when i got um when i was wearing contacts all the time it meant i got like 50 off the frames okay so like all in there are only like 120. bro that's not the price of bass and tape exactly yeah i need i need these these are like i've been cruising on the 15 pound glasses for like the last six months out of your eyes i feel like you don't need to wear them all the time no so i basically wear it so i don't get migraines uh so like basically it's like my right eye is perfect yeah but my left eye is like super it's like pretty blurry yeah but like i've got i'm like so used to my right eye doing all the work yeah i don't need them but it's just like it's just um if i start to get a migraine i put one and it just means that my left eye starts working a bit harder in my right eye yeah Are you all purged, Blake? I just do crazy. Hopefully, I think the allergy medicine and the coffee is going to be late. 20, 30 bitches down on the knees. Water, water, H2O. No big screens, no H2O. Wait, are we rolling? We're having allergies. Allergies to performance? No, no, no. I like performance because I like attention. Okay. It's a bunch of attention. That's why you come inside in front of three guys. We got allergies. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. I woke up right before 10 a.m.

allergies pounding and i was like oh i'll go talk to three random guys because i like the attention wait are you not familiar with our with our with our work with our milieu no i'm familiar i heard the chanel beads interview was that to your satisfaction any any points of critique no i was like okay they seem cool that's really all we're asking for it's kind of in the name we're just trying to raise our stock yeah yeah A nice neutral response is what we need. A nice neutral. Yeah, it's about time. Do you still get excited about performing? Yeah, I love performing. I performed a lot in the fall. What, with Malky Smith? No, I was on tour like... from September till December, kind of on and off. So then I hadn't performed for a while. And then this past weekend, I went to Kansas City and I played a birthday party and then I played a house show in St. Louis. What's Kansas City and St. Louis like? What kind of musicians come out of that? Yeah, I guess you guys were saying there's an ambient scene in Kansas City. I don't know anything about that. I don't really listen to ambient music. Yeah, I thought both cities were cool. I'm sure it's like this where you guys live too, but I feel like kind of the more random the city, the more free-spirited. I feel like people are kind of less concerned with trying to conform to trends or something because it's not like there's some label looking for the next. trendy you know they're just like doing it for the love of the game they're expressing themselves more purely more purely yeah so i always love um i always feel very lucky to play in like a rose city i haven't been in kind of a middle american context and meet the people in the scenes there because i think they liked me yeah well i made made a lot of friends

I thought you were going to say you made a lot of money. I was excited for a say. I made more money than you can fathom, you know, on a house show and a birthday party. Yeah, the musician lifestyle. With a birthday party, do you kind of feel, is it like more of like a clown type thing at like a kid's birthday party? Or is it like you kind of, is it like, do you remember that MTV show Sweet 16 where they'd get like Juicy J to come and perform? It's neither. It felt somewhat similar to, have you seen The Hangover? yeah awesome awesome movie it felt like that like it was these um these kind of like middle-aged guys who all have like wives and kids and it was one of their birthday and some of them had seen me play at south by yes so it's this group of guys some of them had seen me play at south by after they saw me play at south by they uh kind of traveled around like between the group They came to three of my shows on my last tour. Oh, wow. And then one of them hit me up and was like, will you come out and play one of our, it's like two of their birthdays. And they're like, we're doing it in Kansas City. And so then I linked up with them and partied. I was in Kansas City for like 24 hours, but we just kind of partied. I played music. at they had like a private venue and it had like a stage and a pa and um like the group of guys that brought me out like the friend group were kind of the main ones listening and then kind of everyone else was like in the back like what is what is going on damn so what what type of dude books blake man 1000 for a private birthday party like occupationally and you know yeah i mean these guys were all really cool they all kind of had different jobs yeah but it was like a college friend group who uh like one of them uh owns a concrete company this is actually his concrete company's sweater oh that's that's crazy it's super cool shut them out shut them out yeah portal yeah portal concrete west seattle yeah that's crazy i thought that was like a metal band shirt or something it's my new it's my favorite hoodie

It's actually the design was on his first skateboard. And then he copied the design from the skateboard and put it on the hoodie. And he's not got sued. No. You know if Paul are looking to sponsor any podcasts? I'll let him know. Yeah. What's your tip? I mean, you have like... this product placement so that maybe Schweppes like maybe if you know everyone was drinking Schweppes yeah in all your episodes okay you could kind of you could threaten to pull the rug you could be like Schweppes I don't know if you notice yeah sales are up we've been all drinking Schweppes but we will stop if you don't yeah I think the problem with this podcast is that They don't want the brand association. Yeah, if anything, we could, like, hold brands hostage. We ask them for money. Pay us or we will keep using you. Precisely. Precisely. I think that's probably a more rewarding approach. Yeah. How do you, do you work, like, a day job? Are you living off music? I kind of do, I'll do, like, odd jobs, like, next, I'll do, like, corporate. or religious services, like, sound stuff. Or, like, I did sound for, like, a school fundraiser this month, and then next week I designed a new sound system for a church in New Jersey, and I'm, like, going for the weekend to install it. And then, yeah, like, trying to, if I tour. Like last fall, I toured a bunch and then I lived off that money for a bit. But yeah, kind of, you know, stringing stuff together. Yeah. I improvise. What's the streaming revenue saying? I don't get any revenue off the streaming. Yeah. I do kind of have a new strategy, though. I can show you. You know, canvases on Spotify.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Where it's like plays a video. Well, you know, like when you, do you use Spotify? He doesn't use Spotify now. So you play Spotify. He doesn't really listen to music. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It'll, it plays like a video while some of the songs have like a video instead of album art. And I made this video. It's my Venmo in my cash app. Ah, clever. I should have counted. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, I should have counted. So I'm hoping to get maybe some money. coming in because if you if you're listening to the song now you're like oh that's his venmo his cash app maybe i'll send him some money and he must be really desperate to try and pull a stunt like this or i think i think the more the like that's such a funny question i feel like my i feel like my hope is that people will be like that's so funny and creative i'm gonna send him some money maybe you've got to start sending your fans money No, I put out my, I give them expression and then they give me money and I'll give them more expression. You know, it's this cycle, abusive cycle. I understand. I understand. I trade emotional labor. Yeah, yeah, same. Emotional labor for pennies. This is what this podcast is. It's a lot of emotional labor. We're all emotional moguls though. We are well and truly overflowing with emotion. You mean we're emoguls? We're emoguls. Yeah, I understand. And it feels good. Do you consider yourself an empathetic person? I think so, yeah. What was, someone the other day said something, I don't know, about like, something about, because I'm a Capricorn, and they said something about Capricorn men should be required to take an empathy test or something. So, I don't know what my reputation is, but I feel like I'm generally empathetic. Do you have a cruel streak? A cruel streak? Yeah. Like, Yeah, I think so. Like, I think when I've decided I have, like, an enemy, I definitely want to see them do bad, you know? But I know in my brain that I shouldn't, but, you know, like, hypothetically, I'm like, oh, you know, I just want the best for them. But I think if you get the emotional response, that's okay, you know?

you can't it's not something you should completely fight and suppress that just makes it worse yeah yeah just be aware of it who's on the um hate the man 1000 list hate the man 1000 nice um i feel like uh i don't know i i don't want to say any names but like sometimes i don't know like if like a music journalist tweets like music journalists are always tweeting and some of them will tweet that they don't like me or something and then i'm like that's my op but yeah no no one outside of music journalists though uh oh like if i sometimes like on tiktok people people really hate on tiktok people are really negative on tiktok it's crazy man and uh i've definitely had like tiktoks where there's a bunch of people uh leaving like mean comments but other than that I don't like, you know, in real physical life, I feel like I generally have positive interactions with people. You're a sweetie, man. How could you not? Yeah. I mean, most people are pretty agreeable. It's like social media where people feel very liberated to act cruel. I think it's funny what you say about TikTok as well, because it's such a context-poor space that I think it makes people so much crueler. Like, I run, like, a, like, kind of, like, dance music meme account one. And we'll put shit up there sometime. And people are so mean about it. And I'm like, but I know, like, you have no context for this. You're, like, just going off us for no reason. Yeah. And you have no idea, actually have no idea who we are and that we've got time in the game and shit like this, whereas you're, like, a child. No, it's really interesting. I, um, it's interesting, too, like... I went viral on Twitter this year. I did a tweet about like... About eating girls out, right? Yeah, so you've seen it. And everyone was super positive. Everyone was like... Of course, man. Like, you're so cool. Like, this is so funny. We love Bocats. You make such a good point. What was the take? Do you want me to get it up quickly?

it's not sad but it's just like she's a lot older you know I mean I think like hold on let's see how much usually like okay so the bad baby one was the thing she did was she went she created her account the day she turned 18 so it was like you know perverts and she made like Like, I think she made like $15 million or something in the first year. Let me like, let's just see OnlyFans. Robin, you should do that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, I think I've got to wait. I've got to wait till I hit 50. And do like an older Silver Fox. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But then that gives me 20 years to work the penis pump as well so I can get the really fucking long dong. Yeah, so the top 20. Top three is Bella Thorne makes 11 million a month. Cardi B makes 9.5 million a month. Iggy Azalea makes 9.2 million a month. Damn, that's insane. Which, yeah, that's great money. Yeah, and two of those three are musicians? Two of the three, yeah. Who's Bella Thorne? Was she famous before? I've got no idea. I don't know. It's insane to me to pay for pornography. Uh-oh. I actually don't know what's more fucked up that it's like that everyone thinks it should be free or that lots of people pay for it. It's definitely the paying thing. I think there's maybe something healthy about paying for it. It should be paid for. Yeah, definitely. I think that it like kind of in the same way like have you ever have you ever like picked up a new hobby? and kind of invested a lot of money in the equipment for starting that new hobby. So like getting a drone, for example, to film like weddings and like inside school. Yeah, or maybe, so let's say for instance, someone who's never played an instrument is like, I'm going to learn to play guitar. Yep. And I'm going to spend $250 on this guitar. Because there's like, they paid money, they're a little more invested, like I'm actually going to learn it. But I think there's kind of a similar psychology of like...

If you're like paying for porn, it doesn't feel like this unlimited thing. You probably just want to use the stuff you paid for. I don't know. I've never paid for porn, but even though I am the one advocating, but it seems like a healthy decision. It's like before music became digital and you only had your CD collection and you just got super into that shit. You know, like early Vampire Weekend, I know all that stuff back to front. You know, and it's the same thing. It's like big titty mom back shots. You've paid for that. You're going to know it frame by frame. Yeah. It's exactly the same. It's like, I love this bit. And you're saying that's why Vampire Weekend had their first album that didn't go to number one since the debut. Exactly. Yeah. Exactly. Exactly. I see hot milf through the trees. Yeah. I honestly think pornography in general should not be accessible. I think I'm starting to turn on pornography. Yeah, it's bad, but it's like all evil is going to be there. Of course, it's something too fundamental to ever stop existing. But I've been feeling just increasingly more disgusted with myself. Am I like... My taste in general... With all due respect, I think that's across the board in your life. This is true. There's a current of self-loathing. But I think also it's ravaged my imagination. I'm like... neurologically incapable of imagining a boob. Like, I need it to be depicted. Yeah, well, there you go. I mean, I can, I can, I'm logging that one. I'm logging that one. Yeah, an imagination goon is like, it's really good for the, for the spirit and for the brain. Did you say an imagination goon? Imagination goon, yeah. Nah, that's, it's, I mean, there's like so, it's like very well documented. Porn is not the best thing for people, especially. in excess. Right. Are you a frequent imagination gooner? I'm not a frequent gooner, actually. I'm a goon culture appropriator, if anything. I haven't been gooning much, but probably as in details, I'll...

speak about it on the pod. Do you have a similar relationship to Gooning that I feel like I maybe have to like Comic Con and shit like that where it's like I'm really here for all the people making the effort to do it properly and like I wish I had the time. Well I think like the internet jokes about Gooning are so funny. Yeah okay yeah yeah yeah. And like the like terminology too like like joke. Jelking or jelk maxing. Edge maxing. That's all really funny. Just conceptually. Wait, I have no idea what jelking is. I'm not fully arguing beyond the immediate. You might just Google it later. That's fine. We'll just green screen it on. I think... Yeah, jelking is like the funniest word ever. Do you know jelking? Dude, I know it intimately. There's a jelker among us. A jelk maxer among us. Yeah, you ever go to the gym to jelk? Jelking is when you hang weights off your dick in an attempt to stretch out the tissue. Is this similar to... you know in how to with john wilson the guy who's trying to grow back his foreskin and he writes the song about it oh yeah that that's a crazy episode of t i was like not expecting that it's so good and it's just that anybody want a grapefruit soda and it's just like his daughter ignoring him yeah it's amazing it's absolutely amazing i've been having kind of this like ongoing discussion with friends but um how to with john wilson is awesome but i've started like I feel like I've been seeing a lot of vloggers and social media users mimicking his style in a really obnoxious way. I think I'm sympathetic to him. I like a lot of the stuff that he's put out. What he created is extremely unique, but his narrative style is extremely irritating to me. I love it when he does it, but then when other people do it, I'm like... I mean, I think that probably is the way he naturally speaks, but I can't help but think it's also like a little bit affected in a way that I find kind of like twee and grating. Yeah. Yeah, I mean, I guess maybe that's where we differ. I believe him fully. I'm just like, that's probably how he is. But then when I hear someone mimicking his style, there's no belief.

I believe zero percent that it's organic because I know it's inspired by him. And then I find it. Yeah, it's like the most annoying thing. Are you a big authenticity head? Do you decry the lack of authenticity? No, I don't even. I think I'm I just tend to appreciate performance over authenticity. And I think that was like maybe something about. like the second half of the 2010s musically that I think is annoying as it was like so focused on authenticity and so averse to performance in a way that I thought was kind of boring. Wait, define your terms. What does authenticity and performance mean to you? I think authenticity, at least in the context of like a music project, would be that The audience is meant to believe everything to be totally non-fictional from the aesthetics to the narratives and the music. And like, to me, a lot of my favorite music throughout all of history, like maybe the... thing that's fun about it is that there are non-fictional elements and they're all there's fictional elements you kind of don't know which is which because the lines blurred i think that's something that's really interesting about um music and songwriting um so anyway i feel like in the 2010s because of social media i think people audiences and artists kind of forgot about that there can be fiction and in music and in performance and I think things were really like authenticity focused you know and now I think there is a lot more of like now I think we're like there's been like a pushback against that and now we're like in a really performance heavy era which I really enjoy. The vibe has shifted. It's like Lana Del Rey 10 years ago people thought it was like

So I feel like she's always been on that. She's advanced because she's always been performing. Exactly. And, but no, but the critics did not fuck with her by then. And now obviously she's. Yeah. Like that was what people criticized. Yeah. She's not even American. She's Canadian. And it's like, that's the whole point. It's crazy that it was, it was meant to be like this, this crazy, like gotcha that she was like, she was taking on a persona. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, another one was, you guys were mentioning earlier, Vampire Weekend. Yeah. Of course. People were like, you know, there was like this, the whole. like concept of the band was this like performance and um i feel like there were points in the 2010s where people were really critical of them being like no they were yeah they're waspy and it's like well that's the whole like bit that's that's the vibe yeah that's why it was good i think that was the problem is that like it's interesting that both the artists you bring up are like referencing wasp culture as well specifically there's a very easy punching bag like mid 2010s yeah well and then like we look at artists like some newer artists we we've already mentioned like cardi right like so performative like everything is like performance and which is like so cool compared to like kendrick or something you know and i love kendrick too but um how did we get wait we're talking about how to with john wilson we're talking about authenticity how did we get on authenticity Oh, because of John Wilson's effective delivery and people, like, mimicking it? Oh, yeah. Yeah, I don't know. It's like this thing where people, like, I feel like they're performing, but they think they're being authentic. I don't know. I don't like when they mimic John Wilson. But I believe John Wilson. And I like his show a lot. It's a very easy style to do badly. Yeah. To do it with the finesse that he does. Anything that's too copied of another thing, I'm never going to be too into. Do you have copiers? Also, we're an anti-copying podcast. Fuck copiers. This is anti-copying. Are people jacking your swag in New York City? I don't think so. I don't know. Maybe I'm not. I haven't. You're too unique. Yeah, I'm too unique.

I also kind of feel like I'm always kind of changing up a bit. There's something I wanted to talk about. I feel like you're rapping a lot at the moment. You've gone rap mode. I love rapping. Yeah, rapping's really fun. I love rap music. I love a lot of different types of music. Yeah, yeah, of course. I feel very comfortable to make whatever I'm into. And I think that...